Laces
I apologize for the length of time between entries – it seems as if it takes 10 times the energy to type and I find myself feeling like it’s just too hard to bother. But I also realize that if I don’t take the time, it won’t happen, so here goes.
Thanks for reading this by the way…
We had a time of prayer with many friends (family really) last week. I am once again humbled by you guys – it has been the most trying time of my life, and here you showed up and offered us your support yet again. One thing in particular stood out to me, and it was something significant (to me anyways). I came with shoes but the laces were untied – something I have never done. That afternoon when we were getting ready I saw them and thought, why bother – I ain’t walking so what’s the point? So we sang (ok, I sang inside) and prayed and in the end stood (by the way Jim, thank you for interpreting and stepping in to assist) and it was good to be there. Then we packed up and it was time to go home when two tremblingly obedient people sauntered nervously over and did something remarkable. She (I’m sorry, I don’t know her name) bent down and tied my laces, and I’m not sure who said “Don’t want you to trip on them.”
Let me say that this simple act spoke volumes to me, and the significance was not lost on me. My response was “Well, shall we try it?” and I tried to stand. I understand a few things better now. I have great respect for people who are healed of something crippling. Think about what goes through their (my) mind when told “Get up”. I mean, I know first hand the inner struggle. ‘I know I can’t – I’ve tried a hundred times on my own, and yet instinct tells me I gotta try…’ it takes faith with guts to say that to someone, and to respond as well. In the end, I suspect that’s the goal, to believe even when we know it’s impossible. I find myself in a dying body being confronted with tangible degradation on a daily basis – requiring assistance for everything from eating and drinking to rolling over – and I don’t know if I will live here much longer. I keep expecting something to happen and I seriously want to sing like David did in Psalm 40 1-3
I waited and waited and waited for God. At last he looked; finally he listened.
He lifted me out of the ditch,
pulled me from deep mud.
He stood me up on a solid rock
to make sure I wouldn't slip.
He taught me how to sing the latest God-song,
a praise-song to our God.
For now I wait
Psalm 13
To the Chief Musician. A Psalm of David.
1 How long, O Lord? Will You forget me forever?
How long will You hide Your face from me?
2 How long shall I take counsel in my soul,
Having sorrow in my heart daily?
How long will my enemy be exalted over me?
3 Consider and hear me, O Lord my God;
Enlighten my eyes,
Lest I sleep the sleep of death;
4 Lest my enemy say,
“I have prevailed against him”;
Lest those who trouble me rejoice when I am moved.
5 But I have trusted in Your mercy;
My heart shall rejoice in Your salvation.
6 I will sing to the Lord,
Because He has dealt bountifully with me.
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It was very good to actually see want you meant to say... I have been trying hard to get some kind of understanding... re. how you think... Your care aide... dave
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Stephen, I know how bad things are going at present. Me and some 80 year old women from some prayer chains I've tapped are praying. And going without food. We're still with you!
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Hi Stephen,
It's been several years since we've talked but I'm hoping you still remember me. I stumbled across your website and spent a while reading your blogs from the past several months. I can't imagine what you are going through but your thoughts and comments are an inspiration. I'll be praying for you and your family.
Tom
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Hey Tom
How could I forget you? Anyways, thanks for taking the time to read, comment and pray.
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Stand Strong, Stephen.
God, family and friends are here with you.
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Stephen and Jaclyn, I don't know you but you are part of our Abby Vineyard church body. May God give you grace for this day, for this moment. God has not forgotten you though you sit and wait..for an uncertain future. Thoughts and prayers, Val Warkentin
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Hello Stephen - I am the crazy friend of Dave (your care giver)who wrote you last night about the book I was reading "If you want to walk on water GET OUT OF THE BOAT" In talking to Dave last night I asked him if he thought I could come and meet you - I have a crystal that reflects all of the facets of Jesus in our lives, a few books that you might enjoy and I wanted to know if you would care to be annointed (I can and would do so if that was OK with you.) I will wait for Dave to get back from Prince George which should be in about a week I think - I am not sure if he had time to let you know that Susan's Mother died last night and that they have gone up and will probably be back shortly after the funeral>
I look forward to meeting you as Dave says you are a great guy and cute too (I am 66 so I guess you will be safe- or I will be)
Luv
Meg
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